My recent piece, on "Self-help in old age" brought out a few responses showing sympathy and consolation presuming that I actually was craving for praise. But after reading the "Middle" by my role model blogger Bikram Vohra in The Times of India, Mumbai edition, ( reproduced below), I now think that I too indeed have been neglected!

Ageist Party

" I said I didn’t want to go but the family insisted so I got into uncomfortable clothes and went to the party. Younger people have absolutely no idea how to handle us older lot. They think if they put you in a comfy chair their job is done. The host walks up and says, oh so nice uncle came, what will he have. Firstly, I am not your flipping uncle and secondly, cut this third-party talk, all six feet of me sitting here, talk to me directly.

Then they get you a drink and, if it is alcohol, they pour such a small one you could serve it in a teaspoon. At which point a young lady to whom you have just been introduced as your daughter’s father is doing that mandatory good manners ‘hanging in there for 90 seconds’ act and to fill in the pointless silence says hope the snacks are not too spicy for you. Darling I could not only out-drink you under the table I can also out-spice you under that same table.

Then they patronise. Hope the music is not too loud, should we tone it down.

Most irritatingly, they also talk loudly and slowly and they see this as stunning good manners. Stop yelling, young man.

You wonder what you are doing there seeing as how they never invited you directly, it is always the kids saying they asked to bring you along, like a stepney and it really bugs you and now you have finished the teaspoon in one sip and no one is refilling it because no one thinks you will have another teaspoon of whisky. You sit and you sog, the big ignore broken occasionally by sundry folks coming to pay their respects. And you are thinking stuff your respect, I came to have a good time.

There is an intriguing, heated discussion among four or five of them and they are using cheerful expletives and looks like fun so you heave yourself out of the chair and you join them, all set with your two penny worth of opinion and because of you entering the fray the debate dies in the water and every one kind of goes into such tedious politeness you want to use expletives.

So you slink back to your chair and wish you were home watching Netflix or reading a book, so much more fun than younger people being nice, nothing is more dreary. Finally the ordeal is over, you have been used as the excuse to leave early, everyone understands (aaaarghhhh) and on the way back you are asked if you enjoyed the evening. No."

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 Self-Help in Old Age

Of late, I feel a certain void in my  life as nobody praises me to my face for all the good qualities I possess and exhibit.  When I was in service in semi-government offices and later as faculty in management training/education institutions, I used to receive,  expectedly of course,   encomiums about my intelligence and oration showered by  my subordinates and  students respectively. Now even the group of senior citizens  I meet in our Cooperative Housing Society  have stopped  praising  my erudition in Hindi despite  being a Tamil.

All the above notwithstanding,  what disappoints me the most is that  my wife too does not appreciate  my astute political analysis vis -a -vis Karnataka elections or my insightful interpretation of the New Education Policy 2020 or NCERT’s rationalization of school syllabi or  my profound musical heritage. The last talent extends to all forms of music ranging from classical Carnatic to Hindustani to film music and  even the  jingles in TV advertisements  like the one on Rajasthan’s march of progress.      

During our morning ritual of sipping coffee  at the dining table when the social distance between us is narrow, the wife sits like Rodin’s statue ”The Thinker”. The invigorating coffee sets me  on my talents exhibiting one or the other of the many things mentioned above. and she sits there as if to prove the old adage that No Man is a hero to his Woman. At the most,  her response on these occasions is confined  to listing my  tasks for the day such as  buying  vegetables and groceries including broomstick and mop cloth or getting the Society electrician to repair the non-functional geyser switch in the bathroom.  As if this was not bad enough, she would ask me to secure  the dhoti tightly with a belt so that I don’t walk like Mammooti and Mohandas in Malayalam films always holding one end of the dhoti.

This sense of deep desperation  has landed me in  a new pastime  during  my sleepless hours on the nights when I compose  in the third person singular what I crave  to hear about myself  from others. I find this a jolly good exercise for semi-insomniacs.  For instance, I would imagine that my wife would tell others that  I am the only person with the gift to appreciate the different beats of the dholak player in film music  while others go for the voice of the singer, the beauty of the lyrics, or the symphony of the instruments.  Similarly, I visualize her admitting to others  that but for me  she would not have  learned the use  of correct prepositions  and other English grammatical niceties. I even would imagine as if she  praises me  for my immaculate and  cultivated dignity, respect, and politeness in my conversations with others, especially with those from her side of the family.  

Now,  tell me, readers,  am I wrong in presenting to  myself those adoring  words of  praise for me but don’t  get them anymore  and therefore choose the  “ Atma Nirbhar “route to compose them myself? 

 Media Reforms

It is the season for reforms now, what with people demanding administrative, electoral, judicial and even constitutional reforms towards betterment of our lives. For me, however, media reforms are the most important for making my daily life happier and less irksome. In spite of the regulatory bodies for the print media like the Press Council of India, my difficulties as a user have not been addressed by their regulations. They only deal with the CONTENT of the news and not from the point of view of user- convenience of the readers.

My newspaper reading started in early 1950s in Delhi as a teenager. The Hindustan Times those days was printed in an unchanging format of pages to facilitate turning to the right page for reading the editorial, the middles, articles, sports news, local crime news, news from abroad and even obituaries. Advertisements were there then also, but mostly notices inviting tenders issued by the government and photographs of missing persons inserted by the Delhi Police. . No advertisements of soaps and detergents, electronic goods, tuition classes, Daily editions were usually in multiples of 4 pages making it easy to hold the paper with both hands in the middle, sitting relaxedly in a chair sipping coffee. My father, myself and my young nephew would rush to grab the paper as the delivery boy threw it at our door. We did not redistribute the pages amongst ourselves as was done in Corporation Public Reading Rooms. Instead, we breathed down the neck of the one who was reading and urging him to read quickly. Yet, it was a pleasure reading the newspaper those days and when the paper did not come on public holidays, we felt that the day has been a waste.

Contrast the above with the travails of the newspaper reader today. A single sheet containing important news and not advertisements is loosely tucked inside. It falls off every now and then. Often a couple pages wider than other pages are added with strips of the extra width jutting out like the sore thumb. These aberrations apart, headlines making news in front page are continued in an inner page, many a time with a different heading.

Full page advertisements occupy first two sheets, which makes the news worthy of first page, appears actually on the 5th page which however is numbered as page 1. Full page advertisements range from Coaching Classes, with photographs of All India Rank-holders with names such as Aggarwals and Bansals , to the e-commerce merchandise seller announcing festival sale with hefty discounts, to builders putting up panoramic view of their forthcoming housing projects in exotic spots with artificial lakes with names like Chateau . Then there are the inserts of fliers of various sizes and shapes containing the menu of the local restaurants or services of the gender-neutral beauty parlor. Last but not the least are the full page announcements of forthcoming Business Conferences organized by either the newspaper or some industry association with names of eminent panelists for selecting the best entrepreneur/ start-up/ life-time achiever etc. of the year and of course the names of speakers from foreign business schools and our own Cabinet Ministers and some spiritual guru followed in the subsequent days photographic coverage of the event occupying even more full pages .These have reduced the importance and the space for Letters To The Editor, the reader’s only column called his own

As an octogenarian addicted to my daily quota of newspaper reading from page one to the last page item “printed and published” as the cliché goes, where do I go to read a paper with ONLY NEWS

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Ramasubban Subramanian

Tenor

 I publish hereunder a  review of my  Memoirs by Sakuntala Narasimhan, a Bengaluru-based senior journalist, musicologist, a renowned vocalist in both traditions of Indian classical music - Hindustani and Carnatic and consumer activist. It appeared in October-December 2021 issue of Vidura

Book Review

ACCOUNTANT TO ACADEMIC: AN UNMAPPED JOURNEY

Author: A.V. Raman

Publisher: Notion Press, Chennai

Price: Rs 315

Suddenly a lot of former bureaucrats and retired officials seem to be coming out with their memoirs, describing their careers and experiences. Here is one, by one who has had varied experiences as aca­demic, researcher, teacher as well as a management expert. He has chronicled his professional as well as related personal life, weaving the two into a very read­able account of what it is like, to be a bureaucrat who does not merely sign papers and draw a salary but also seeks to contribute ideas to make office procedures more efficient and people-friendly.

Born in 1938 in Tamil Nadu, Raman lived (and schooled) in Delhi, worked in Jamshedpur, Madras, Pune and Bangalore, went abroad on assignments and as a Fulbright Fellow before settling down in Mumbai. His career took him as senior accountant to CSIR (Council of Scientific and Industrial Research); he also served in the Rajya Sabha secretariat, besides teaching financial management and economics and did a stint as associate dean at Bangalore’s XIME.

It has been a very varied professional life of over 50 years, in different capacities (as director, consultancy, educator and mentor). Raman also went on to do a doctorate on transportation management after study­ing the public transport systems in different cities, car­ried out various cost saving initiatives in some of them and became a training officer. Very few bureaucrats can claim such versatility.

As if this were not enough, Raman also plays the mri­dangam, having trained under such stalwarts as the late Ramnad Eswaran (one of the leading artistes of his day, during the second half of the last century) and performed in public. He hails from a family steeped in classical music; his sister was a popular broadcaster from Delhi AIR before she moved south to Bangalore.

Raman weaves all the details into a readable account that is also occasionally humorous. His Fulbright Fel­lowship was for a post-doctoral research which saw his talents used as director of business schools and insti­tutes of management (in Chennai and Pune) before retirement. By a curious coincidence, the day I read about how he refused a bribe of Rs 800 from a contrac­tor, I also heard about a sub-registrar in a government department collecting Rs 70000 as bribe in Bengaluru for facilitating a signature on a routine form. (We have certainly ‘progressed’ from the time Raman was in ser­vice, to today!)

Not all civil service personnel are articulate enough to write their memoirs. Most do not bother, or have had uneventful professional lives that have nothing to showcase or learn from. Some, like this account, provide inspiration as well as insights into how one can contribute to improving public undertakings. Not all government officials are mere ‘cogs in a machine’; those who want to contribute in small or not-so-small ways, can. And do. Like this author. May his tribe increase.

(Reviewed by Sakuntala Narasimhan.)

 

Innovations in Education

We seem to have come a long way reforming the Macaulay’s education system. Examinations are now conducted to test what the students logically know rather than what they remember and reproduce from the text book. They have now a choice of multiple answers to a question to choose the one he/she thinks correct.

Now the next inevitable reform has happened.  In  Maharashtra  HSC Board Exam held  yesterday,   in the poetry section of the English paper, one of the questions, A4,  had the answer printed while the other two,  A3 and A5,   had no question but  only the remark “Accept any reasonable correct answer”!  Is this a sort of reverse engineering adapted in  school education to test a student’s ability to construct a meaningful question to fit a chosen answer!! When perplexed students raised this, some teachers told them to simply write a few lines of the poetry that was printed so that the question   remained attempted. The authorities have accepted that is was due to a printing error and students who have attempted  the particular question will be awarded marks. Here the NOTA choice in our elections will not do.

In UP, Board exams have been boycotted by some 6.5 lakh of students. The reason is the government’s strict action to keep the education mafia in check using a network of CCTV cameras to maintain a close watch on examination centres, superintendents and room invigilators. The students understanding of their stakeholdership in examinations appears weird..

One of my  students in an  MBA examination  chose to occupy the chair close to the wall  in the far end leaving many chairs in the front. When I asked him to come and occupy a chair in the front, he said with a wry smile that he would sit as per the advice of his “vastu” consultant!  Another student was not happy with his low marks and expressed dismay, notwithstanding his access to question paper leaked the previous evening .  He suspected foul play in paper correction!

A Blog on my Blogs

 A Blog on my Blogs

Post my retirement and shifting to Mumbai in 2006, I rambled along without anything to occupy my time.  I became a member of The Fine Arts Society in Chembur and attended their music concerts and drama festivals.  I noticed that the audience was mostly senior citizens like me ‘I observed very interesting traits among such audiences like simple living, unostentatious appearance, religiously inclined, interest in classical music, and a subtle sense of humour.  I decided to write for a hobby about men and matters I was acquainted with.  When I learned that many internet users create virtual Persona while writing stories and Fanfiction as a kind of self-insertion   I created the characters  Chembur Mama and Chembur  Mami and wrote my early pieces with those titles. I used the internet to publish them as Blogs by Rambler Raman.  This was in 2014 and since then I have written around 40 blogs available on www.avramanblogspot.com.rambler raman.  

Before I go further, let me share a few facts about blogs. A blog is a regular record of one’s thoughts, opinions, or experiences put on the internet for others to read. It also can include photos and videos about a particular subject. The blog is different from a podcast, a collection or series of digital audio files downloaded or listened to via the internet. A blogger is a person who writes regularly for an online journal or website. Such a person is different from a writer or a columnist publishing in a newspaper or magazine.   The use of the internet as the media for publication distinguishes the blogger from the columnist or the writer.  There are 600 million active blogs on the internet ranging from online personal diaries to influential sources of information on virtually any topic like food blogs, travel blogs, health blogs,, and fashion & beauty blogs to name a few.  Like any communication medium, the blog should also have a purpose to educate, inform, influence, or entertain/amuse. However, Personal blogs based on one’s personal perception and experience about men and matters have a large following and receive both appreciative and critical comments

Coming back to my creations, I adopted early in my blog writing career to write mostly about my personal experience and opinion. This was easy because no research was involved unlike my Ph. D or post-doctoral dissertations.  I would intersperse my blogs with humor by narrating jokes [1]or piquant situations [2]. These provided the necessary spice to the anecdotes in my blogs. I also wrote some self-deprecating pieces where I projected myself as “kalnayk.[3] Some of my blogs are pure fiction where I described the train journey of a young man which brought a total change in him including his name[4]. Writing about people and places is another genre of some of my pieces. [5] My attempt to use allegory in my blogs was abandoned as a reader identified the person written about.[6] I did not want to get into any libel suits.   I also had a very critical and admonishing comment on my blog containing my perception of the General Knowledge questions in the civil services examination. [7]

I do not claim a big readership but the few who have commented on my blogs have been very generous and appreciated my style of writing and humor. In the end, I must say that I find immense pleasure in writing blogs. My motivation is not to earn money by blogging though many use brands and endorsements of products and services in their blogs and earn well.  I write and derive “atma thripthi”  

 

 

 

 

---

[1] Delhi’s  Madrasis

[2] Navarathri in New Delhi                  

[3] The “Auto”graphy of my first car

[4] The Transformational of NKV

[5] Tambrahms: Where to find them

[6] The Angry Husband Part 1,2 and 3

7. The Old Man and GK

 The Calendar Vettai

New Year 2023 has begun but the Vettai (the Tamil word for Hunting) for calendars has ceased.  The internet and smartwatches have dealt a death blow to calendars; now one can access a calendar of any year of the past or future, thanks to data download and storage options making the calendars obsolete. 

The hunt for calendars would start in early December of the year before and continue till the end of February/March of the New Year.  Long-forgotten friends and acquaintances in big companies like Hindustan Lever, Kingfisher Airlines, etc.,   would be approached for their prestigious calendars. Only the most privileged will be lucky to get one. The calendar would be nicely rolled and packed in a cardboard tube and carried home hiding it from the prying eyes of neighbors. These corporate calendars were usually printed on 12 full-size sheets of glossy art paper with photographs of beauty parade models and young cinema stars. or some exotic pictures of snow-clad mountains of the Himalayas or Alps. In some years, they would go thematic with classical dance forms of India featuring eminent dancers or temple Gopurams or African safari and wildlife. Dates and months were only of secondary importance. Some companies would bring out what could be called Desk calendars but they did not command a premium for use in homes.

Lesser mortals will approach their regular grocers, clothiers, and other sundry merchants.  These calendars were mostly advertisements of their wares and products like LG brand asafoetida (Hing in Hindi) or TSR sandalwood powder or Kanchipuram silks. The name, address, and telephone number of the shop would be printed in bold letters and doled out only to regular and longstanding customers. The image of a Hindu deity like Goddess Lakshmi or Lord Ganesha or their brand ambassador, usually a cinema star, would be featured in them. Months and dates would be printed in small size letters on three or four thin papers clipped/glued at the bottom.  Some corporate would bring out desk- calendars but would not command a premium for display on home walls.

The irony about these prized calendars is that their charm and appeal would be only for a few days proving the saying in Tamil “Mogam Mupathu  Naal”, meaning their charm lasts at best for thirty days with some of them not even fully straightened from their embryonic posture of rolled position requiring a clothesline clip to be used.  It is inexplicable that after so much effort to get them, they were left to hang on the walls with sheets of months gone by not even removed.

My mother was not however satisfied with either the corporate or smaller mercantile calendars because the dates were not printed in individual boxes not providing adequate space for writing the daily milk and dhobi accounts.  She, therefore, insisted on my bringing a Government of India calendar printed and distributed by the Directorate of Audio and Visual Publicity, DAVP, and distributed for use in government offices.  They were of monotonous pattern year after year showing bold and big-sized numbers in a separate big box for each date.  It is another matter that they were seldom hung in offices but found their space on the walls of residences of government servants.

In our family, none of the above types of calendar answered the need for data of the day such as Rahu kalam, Yamakandam, Yogam, ruling Nakshatra, and the Thithi. Only the “Daily” calendar brought out by the Tamil publishing house Rani Muthu with the unchanging image of Lord Murugan with his inevitable “Vel” was the answer and a permanent feature in our home.  Each day even now begins with the tearing off of the thin slip showing the previous day’s data and a namaskaram and a prayer with folded hands for a happy today. The only snag with the Murugan Calendar has been about their disposal at year-end as in deference to my mother’s sentiments for deities they should not be discarded but preserved.   

Let me end this piece with a joke. At the beginning of each New Year, the office of the  Director General of Supplies & Disposals,  Government of India, would get a pile of calendars from the supplier company representatives calling on the officers for New Year greetings.   On a complaint that their distribution was not equitable among officers and staff, orders were issued that all calendars should henceforth be deposited with a clerk at the Reception office who would be responsible for hanging the calendars in the officers’ rooms. When the complaint persisted and the clerk was called to explain, he showed the record diligently maintained by him of the names and designations of officers with the remark against each as “Hanged” or “Will be hanged later”.